Personalities:

So I'm not perfect -- live with it!

I only have one nerve left and everyone's getting on it.

What part of "no" don't you understand?

If you don't like my attitude -- stop talking to me!

If it weren't for the last minute, I'd get nothing done.

I don't know where I'm going but I'm definitely making good time.

Of all the things I've ever lost, I miss my mind the most.

I don't do mornings.

When I want your opinion I'll give it to you.

I'm as happy as if I was in my right mind.

I need adult supervision.

I'm on the phone and I can't shut up.

I don't need your attitude.  I have one of my own.

I do whatever the voices in my head tell me to do.

I don't suffer from insanity.  I enjoy every minute of it.

How can I miss you if you won't go away?

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

Bad spellers of the world -- UNTIE!

How can I be expected to control my life when I can't control my hair?

I've had it with reality.  I need a fairy godmother.

If we are what we eat, I must be cheap, fast and easy!

Why be disagreeable when with a little effort you can be impossible?

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor!

Whatever.

I don't suffer from stress.  I'm a carrier.

My reality check bounced.

This land is your land.  This land is my land.  So stay on your land.

Madness takes its toll.  Please have the exact change.

Support the right to arm bears.

My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot.

I run with scissors...

When you hurt a mime, does it make a sound?

I would do absolutely nothing for a Klondike bar.

I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

I finally got my head together.  Now my body is falling apart.

Funny...I don't remember being absent-minded.

If all is not lost, where is it?

I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.

Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.

There's one in every crowd and they always find me.

Wink.  I'll do the rest.

I don't get even.  I get odder.

My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

I'm having an out of money experience.

I plan on living forever.  So far, so good.

I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.

Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

A PBS mind in an MTV world.

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

I want it all and I want it delivered.

Just give me the chocolate and  no one gets hurt.

I doubt, therefore, I might be.

Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.

Don't bother me.   I'm living happily ever after.

If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.

Allow me to introduce my selves.

Whisper my favorite words: "I'll buy it for you..."

Better living through denial...

Here I am! Now what are your other two wishes?

I plead contemporary insanity.

Meandering to the beat of a different drummer...

I don't believe in miracles.  I rely upon them.

Next mood swing: 6 minutes.

And your point is...?

I used to be schizophrenic but we're okay now.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

I'm not a complete idiot.  Some parts are missing...

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

Even if the voices aren't real, they still have some good ideas.

Always happy, never sad, sometimes naughty, never bad.

Don't treat me any differently than you would treat the queen.

I have a black belt in shopping.

Normal people worry me.